On the heels of March Madness, the American public is now being entertained by ‘Mexican Maid Madness’ that includes a mistress and a mystery and not necessarily Mexican maids but Latina maids nonetheless. Move over Flo from The Jeffersons these Latinas are movin’ on up - and we are a witness to their cultural assimilation.
In a time when there is a record number of ‘English Only’ state mandates and social conservatives demanding that Latino immigrants assimilate these ‘Mexican Maids’ in their madness have done just that.
The madness started when Nicky Diaz disclosed that she was making $23/hour working for former California gubernatorial candidate, the chilly Meg Whitman, while being undocumented.
This little Mexican maid not only knew enough English to dial up fame-whore Gloria Allred to be her lawyer but was assimilated enough to get herself a nice Goldilocks dye job and Brazilian straightening while donning a respectable St. John’s knock off to meet the press.
Who says immigrants aren’t learning to fit in?
Can the same be said about American-made Joslyn James another Allred client and former Tiger Wood’s girlfriend that looked like a porno star when meeting the press? Well actually, she is a porn star, but I digress.
Most of all, Nicky had enough American balls to call out her former boss when it would do the most damage on charges of being “exploited, disrespected, and humiliated”. What red-blooded American doesn’t dream of doing something like that and in front of cameras.
Diaz’ revelations about Whitman cameright after candidate Meg called for a crackdown down on employers who hire undocumented workers. Many accused Nicky of being a political operative that derailed the Republican party of California. From undocumented to toilet bowl cleaner to political operative, is that not the ultimate example of immigrant success that the Republicans are looking for?
Now some months later, we have Latina Mildred Patty Baena alleged to be clocking in a cool $30/hour or $1,200/week for cleaning the stove and Arnold Schwarzenegger’s hardware.
Did I miss a chapter in the rule book of Mexican/Latina servitude? A maid making it on her back instead of breaking it?
TMZ is even alleging Patty was an aggressive aggressor when pursing Arnold to have sex and unprotected at that. Is there any greater proof of assimilation then having the Terminator become the Sperminator and obtaining the ultimate American accessory according to Republicans - an anchor baby? Of course, we don’t know the legal status of Patty or if she’s even of Mexican descent but either way she’s all-American now: from sleeping with her boss to having a swimming pool in the back yard. Flo always kept herself and her sass in the back room not the bed room.
However I must point out that most American’s don’t have their swimming pool paid for by an Austrian womanizer whose last name is untranslatable in Spanish.
Adding to this madness is the mysterious Mexican maid who supposedly was assaulted by IMF chief Dominique Strauss-Kahn in Mexico. The very same man accused of a heinous assault in NYC on another maid. And because she is a real Mexican maid living in Mexico, that has not been influenced by American mores, she allegedly went into hiding knowing her culture mandates silence and shame regardless of who is to blame for the attack.
The take away here is that every immigrant in every corner of the U.S. finds his or her own path to assimilation, usually quietly and without fanfare, so no need to legislate it. Everyone eventually moves it on up to fit in.